BONUS REVIEW: FRIDAY THE 13TH: THE FINAL CHAPTER (1984)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

7.5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, once, in April of 2018

BEST SEQUENCE

Tommy and Trish's takedown of Jason

BEST LINE

"It says...it says you're a dead fuck"

"What? A dead fuck?"

"A lousy lay. You know? A dead pecker"

- largely picking this because of the ridiculous number of times Crispin Glover is called a "dead fuck" in this movie, which is also just a ridiculous expression especially considering it's not used to refer to someone who has died

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

22%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"As lumberingly single-minded as its homicidal star, Friday the 13th - The Final Chapter adds another rote entry to an increasingly labored franchise."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"After being announced dead and taken to a morgue, Jason Voorhees spontaneously revives, escapes from the hospital, and stalks a group of friends renting a house in the countryside near Crystal Lake."

DIRECTOR

Joseph Zito

MAIN CAST

Kimberly Beck, Peter Barton, Corey Feldman, E. Erich Anderson, Crispin Glover, Ted White (as Jason)

THOUGHTS

• "The Final Chapter". That's rich
• To be fair, this was intended to be the last Friday the 13th movie because the producer, Frank Mancuso Jr., felt like his work wasn't being respected and Paramount Pictures was fine with ending the franchise due to the declining popularity of slashers. The Final Chapter ended up being a hit, though, so it only took less than a year for the next movie to be released, followed by 6 more sequels and the reboot, so the final chapter wasn't so final anymore
• And in fact, many consider The Final Chapter to be one of the best of the franchise, and this includes my wife, who says it's her favourite of all of them
• For me it's good, but not as good as the first one. I think the strength of The Final Chapter largely comes down to memorable characters. I've seen all of the Friday the 13th movies and I can count on one hand the number of characters who stick out in my memory (and this includes Jason Voorhees, Pamela Voorhees and Kevin Bacon's package). Corey Feldman's Tommy Jarvis and Crispin Glover's Jimmy Mortimer are very memorable characters and worthy additions to the franchise
• Feldman and Glover are also two of the more famous Friday the 13th cast members, to the point that I was surprised by how early this movie was in their respective careers. It was only the third movie for each of them, and the only prior movie I had even heard of was The Fox and the Hound in which Corey Feldman voiced Young Copper (and I also include this fact because I had no idea that Corey Feldman was in that movie)
• And just to emphasize, I really liked Crispin Glover in this movie. So delightfully weird and awkward, but in a very endearing way. Just watch him dance (and supposedly this was all Crispin, based on the way he actually danced in clubs)
• Best kill: Weird to say, but probably when Jason dies (even though we know it doesn't entirely stick). Machete to the head, he falls to the floor and the head slides down the blade. Probably also a good time to mention that Tom Savini, special effects and make-up effects master, came back for this one after having worked on the first Friday the 13th
• Second-best kill: Doug in the shower
• I actually found it hard to pick a best line for this one, as the script is full of gems. Here are a few more:
• "Some pack of patootsies, huh?"
• "Axel, you are the Super Bowl of self-abuse!"
• And, of course, "Jesus Christmas! Holy Jesus! Goddamn! Holy Jesus jumping Christmas shit!" (courtesy of Axel himself)
• As has happened before I had the privilege of watching this movie with friends, and here are their one-line reviews:
• Marlo: "More boobs than plot"
• Andy: "Fully believable"
• Ashley (my wife): "Rob Dier. Knife mechanic."
• And finally, this is an extra special day because not only is it Friday the 13th, but June 13th specifically is Jason's birthday! Blow out the candles, ya big lug, and we'll see you again in February! Or will we...

READERS' CHOICE #28: EDGE OF TOMORROW (2014)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

7.5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, once, and I think it must have been shortly after it was released, so it was about 10 years ago

BEST SEQUENCE

I'll describe it in more detail later because I want to avoid spoilers up top, but it happens at minute 24

BEST LINE

Not a whole lot to choose from, so I'll just go with "On your feet, maggot!"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

91%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Gripping, well-acted, funny, and clever, Edge of Tomorrow offers entertaining proof that Tom Cruise is still more than capable of shouldering the weight of a blockbuster action thriller."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

Redacted for spoiler reasons

DIRECTOR

Doug Liman

MAIN CAST

Tom Cruise, Emily Blunt, Bill Paxton, Brendan Gleeson, Noah Taylor

THOUGHTS

• I really like this movie and if you haven't watched it I think you should. Even though I only saw it once a long time ago, I've always thought fondly of it and I was excited to watch it again. I was so excited to watch it again, in fact, that I even convinced my wife to watch it with me despite the fact that action and sci-fi aren't usually her preferred genres of movie. She also liked it a lot, and maybe even found it more thrilling than I did on this viewing
• And this I partially chalk up to the movie being unspoiled for her. For me, I realized that the real fun of the movie came from the central premise and watching it be realized and explored. The action itself I found a little generic, which is honestly fine in the interest of not overstuffing the movie with ideas and distracting from the real draw, but it does thrill the most on first viewing. And at this point I will again wonder if there's any real concern about avoiding spoilers for a movie that's over a decade old, but hey, if my wife was able to go into it unspoiled, perhaps it could happen for you too
• Spoilers from this point on, however
• So, here's the IMDB synopsis: "A man fighting in a war against aliens must relive the same day every time he dies until he can find a way to stop their power source with the help of an elite soldier." And yep, you guessed it, this is basically a sci-fi/action riff on Groundhog Day. That description is a little reductive, though, because Edge of Tomorrow really does run with the idea, having a lot of fun in the process. Like I said, the action's a little generic especially in the first big battle sequence, but I think this actually enhances the lead-up to my favourite moment, when we watch the ostensible hero of the movie, Tom Cruise's William Cage, die. It's such a fantastic rug pull, seeing ol' Tom's face outright melting after being covered in alien blood. Wait a minute, we might be thinking, what's going on here? Only to then see him wake up again earlier that morning, at which point we realize the game that the movie is playing
• And then the fun really begins, especially getting to watch Tom Cruise die again and again and again - sometimes out of clumsiness, sometimes out of ineptitude, and sometimes out of sheer necessity in order to reset the loop. The film and the Japanese light novel it's based on both took inspiration from the death/respawn loop found in video games, which is a fun additional layer especially for a gamer like me
• Speaking of the light novel that inspired the movie, All You Need Is Kill, that was the movie's original name but they changed it mostly to remove the word "kill" from the title. Live Die Repeat was also considered, although that in itself is kind of a spoiler too
• And I think we'll leave it there. It really is a fun movie and if you haven't seen it I hope that you do (although also if you haven't seen it, I hope that you stopped reading 4 bullet points ago)

Up next: Let the Right One In. And I plan on reviewing the original Swedish movie from 2008, although I have also seen the American remake Let Me In from 2010 (and maybe I'll give that a rewatch too just for a quick compare and contrast)

READERS' CHOICE #29: CITY OF GOD (2002)

TW: Child death

THRILL SCALE 1-10

8.5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Never

BEST SEQUENCE

The farewell party for Benny. The strobe lighting was extremely effective and immediately made me feel on edge and disoriented while watching

BEST LINE

"Why return to the City of God, where God forgets about you?"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

91%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"City of God offers a shocking and disturbing -- but always compelling -- look at life in the slums of Rio de Janiero."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"In the slums of Rio, two kids' paths diverge as one struggles to become a photographer and the other a kingpin."

DIRECTOR(S)

Fernando Meirelles and Kátia Lund

MAIN CAST

Alexandre Rodrigues, Leandro Firmino, Phellipe Haagensen, Matheus Nachtergaele, Seu Jorge

THOUGHTS

• Usually when I say a film reminded me of other films I don't mean that as a bad thing, especially if it reminded me of films I like. This is definitely the case with City of God - a lot of similarities with Scorsese's work, especially Goodfellas (one of my favourite movies), and at times it also reminded me of Tarantino. However, a big difference between City of God and the films of those two directors would be the ages of the main characters. I would estimate that most of the characters in City of God don't make it past their early 20s, and a lot of the action happens when they're even younger, in their teens. In this sense especially I was also reminded of films like Menace II Society and Boyz n the Hood
• City of God takes it even further, however, with some pretty shocking scenes of violence committed by and inflicted upon characters who appear to be 12 and under (and, again, trigger warning and also spoiler warning). There's a harrowing scene in which the teenaged drug lord Li'l Zé wants to make an example of some much younger kids, so he threatens two of them with a gun. I was sure that Li'l Zé was going to let them go after scaring them out of their wits, but no, he actually shoots each of them in the foot before telling another preteen to execute one of them. Again I was sure that Li'l Zé would relent, but the movie sees this scene through to its grim conclusion. It's heartrending but it doesn't feel manipulative
• Just like in Goodfellas this movie moves at a fair clip, rarely settling down for long, and always keeping us captivated. City of God got four nominations at the Academy Awards in 2004 (Director, Cinematography, Film Editing and Adapted Screenplay). Pretty impressive, especially for a foreign film, but that was the same year that The Return of the King won pretty much everything so City of God was definitely at a disadvantage. Oddly enough it wasn't nominated for Best Foreign Film the previous year when it was released in Brazil, and therefore when it was submitted by Brazil to the Academy for consideration
• Speaking of Brazilian cinema, City of God was executive produced by Walter Salles, the director of I'm Still Here, the most recent Best Foreign Film winner
• Finally, the vast majority of the cast was recruited from the real slums of Rio de Janeiro, and some of them had actually lived in the real City of God favela. This contributes to a real sense of authenticity, but in cases like this you also have to hope that it wasn't mere exploitation going on here. Assistance groups were set up to aid the actors after filming finished, but the authenticity vs. exploitation debate is an interesting (and potentially troubling) one to consider

Up next: Some more sci-fi coming at you. Edge of Tomorrow from 2014

READERS' CHOICE #30: BLACK SWAN (2010)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

9

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, but only once in the theatre shortly after it came out

BEST SEQUENCE

It's impossible to forget the moment in Nina's bedroom when her eyes turn red, she plucks a black feather from her back and her legs suddenly bend backwards

BEST LINE

"I felt it. Perfect. It was perfect."

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

85%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Bracingly intense, passionate, and wildly melodramatic, Black Swan glides on Darren Aronofsky's bold direction -- and a bravura performance from Natalie Portman."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"Nina is a talented but unstable ballerina on the verge of stardom. Pushed to the breaking point by her artistic director and a seductive rival, Nina's grip on reality slips, plunging her into a waking nightmare."

DIRECTOR

Darren Aronofsky

MAIN CAST

Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel, Barbara Hershey, Winona Ryder

THOUGHTS

• I was trying to figure out if we would classify Black Swan as a body horror movie, and while it seems that opinions may vary on that point, this movie gets such a high thrill score largely because I was squirming and cringing at many of the changes that we see happen to Nina's body throughout the film. From the extreme end of the spectrum like in what I considered the best sequence described above, to the slightly milder example of Nina peeling a hangnail all the way down her finger, this even goes for the moments that are very real and not imagined by Nina, like the cracked toenail that is just part of being a ballet dancer
• Speaking of which, I've never really been one for the ballet, and this movie certainly doesn't make it seem like a glamourous life, at least not for the most part, or at least not for Nina. When the movie was released there were real-life ballet dancers who took issue with Black Swan's depiction of their profession, and this article is a great read for that point of view, but the gloominess of Nina's day-to-day life certainly adds to the moodiness of the film, and adds to the feeling that Nina is being backed into a corner by this ballet and this role
• It's a fantastic performance by Portman, probably has to be my favourite of hers, and so far it's her only Oscar win
• Finally, I do like forming my own opinions and theories about films, but this is one of those movies that makes me want to immediately go and read other people's analyses - what really happened, and what was all in Nina's mind? For this reason it's also a movie that benefits from multiple viewings, so if you haven't seen it in a while, give it another watch!

Up next: A movie I haven't seen, and one that I know very little about, in fact. City of God from 2002

#41: DIRTY HARRY (1971)

TW: Police brutality, child endangerment

THRILL SCALE 1-10

8

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, once, about ten years ago

BEST SEQUENCE

When Scorpio hijacks a school bus full of kids and Harry jumps onto the roof of the bus from a bridge (a stunt that Clint Eastwood performed himself)

BEST LINE

"I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well to tell you the truth in all this excitement I kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk?"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

89%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"As tough and taciturn as its no-nonsense hero, Dirty Harry delivers a deceptively layered message without sacrificing an ounce of its solid action impact."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"When a man calling himself "the Scorpio Killer" menaces San Francisco, tough-as-nails Police Inspector "Dirty" Harry Callahan is assigned to track down the crazed psychopath."

DIRECTOR

Don Siegel

MAIN CAST

Clint Eastwood, Andy Robinson, Reni Santoni, Harry Guardino, John Vernon

THOUGHTS

• "Dirty" Harry Callahan is the first character of his type that I can think of, a rogue cop vigilante who breaks the rules and takes the law into his own hands in order to ensure the bad guys don't get away with their nefarious plans. Now, for some it may be difficult to find the entertainment value in a story like this - in this day and age, when police violence is a serious concern for many, it may be hard to cheer on the cop who flouts authority and due process and decides to shoot whomever he believes needs shooting. However, it may also be interesting to learn that people have been saying this ever since the movie came out. When it was released, critics like Pauline Kael and Roger Ebert were calling this movie fascist, and they were clearly grappling with the movie's entertainment value vs. the views that it seemed to be espousing
• Perhaps also worth pointing out, though, that while Clint Eastwood is and always has been a Hollywood right-winger, the director, Don Siegel, was not. While talking about Dirty Harry he acknowledged his liberal leanings and explained that in his view Harry was just as evil, in his own way, as the killer (and this is also the second movie by Don Siegel that I've reviewed, after the original Invasion of the Body Snatchers)
• And speaking of the movie's villain, the Scorpio killer is so completely, unrepentantly evil that we also want to see him taken down by any means necessary. Based on the real-life Zodiac Killer, I really liked Andy Robinson's portrayal of this maniac
• And that's about all I have to say about Dirty Harry! Influential as hell but it also holds up even as one of the earliest examples of the subgenre that it in part created. If you can get past the movie's ideology that you may or may not agree with, it definitely comes through with the action and the thrills

Up next: And with that, we reach the end of another block of movies from the AFI list, and it's back into the Readers' Choice films! As a reminder, these were movies that were voted for in the Mark Watches Movies Facebook group, and here are the next ten movies, in order:

Black Swan
City of God

Edge of Tomorrow

Let the Right One In

Parasite

Evil Dead II

Minority Report

The Dark Knight

Point Break

Shaun of the Dead

And so, coming up next, Black Swan from 2010

#42-B: CONAN THE BARBARIAN (1982)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

6.5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Never

BEST SEQUENCE

I'm going to choose a few parts that are snake-related. Conan fighting and beheading a giant snake, Thulsa Doom morphing into a giant snake, even the way that Thulsa Doom is able to use a bow to shoot snakes like they were arrows. And the giant snake special effects are actually pretty good!

BEST LINE

"Conan! What is best in life?"

"To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

67%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Though Conan may take itself too seriously for some, this adventure film about a former slave seeking vengeance is full of quotable Schwarzenegger lines and gritty action."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"A powerful warrior seeks to avenge the genocide of his people and the murder of his parents at the hands of a snake cult."

DIRECTOR

John Milius

MAIN CAST

Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Earl Jones, Sandahl Bergman, Gerry Lopez, Max von Sydow, Mako Iwamatsu

THOUGHTS

• It's silly as hell, but honestly, this movie's a lot of fun and it's not afraid to get bloody. A lot of beheadings!
• I like Schwarzenegger as an action star, I even like him as an actor, but you can definitely see why Conan and the Terminator were his first big breakout roles. Not much dialogue needed, not even much acting required, he really just had to look impossibly big and muscular and physically imposing
• Schwarzenegger's next big hit after Conan and The Terminator was Commando, another movie that I haven't seen, but I probably will someday
• Admittedly I've never been any good at being able to tell when people are wearing wigs in movies or when it's real hair, but I just have to assume that the long, flowing manes are all ridiculous wigs, on James Earl Jones especially. Also, nearly every man in this movie is absolutely hideous
• Wonderful scenery
• Full disclosure, this movie had some pretty serious issues with its treatment of animals, especially with regard to some of the horse stunts. However, I have to mention what might actually be the most memorable moment of the movie for me, when Conan punches a camel in the face and knocks it out. I'm going to give the movie the benefit of the doubt for this scene, as it seems to have been achieved with film editing and convincing sound effects, but it sure did make an impact on me
• Also, another similarly memorable scene that's even more obviously faked, when Conan gets crucified on the Tree of Woe and kills a vulture with just his teeth
• Finally, while watching this movie I did some googling that led to my strongest ever experience of the Mandela Effect, in which I remembered something so vividly that apparently never existed - I remembered that there was a cartoon TV show version of Conan from back when I was a kid, but I could have sworn that it was called Conan the Barbarian, with a theme song that went "Conaaaaan the Barbariaaaaaan". That theme song is the real Mandela Effect here, to the point that anytime I've thought of Conan the Barbarian I've heard that song in my head. But apparently the TV show was called Conan the Adventurer, and that's how the theme song goes, too! The "Conan the Barbarian" lyrics aren't in the movie, I've checked toy commercials and other TV show theme songs, and I just can't find it. Am I crazy? Or am I truly the only one who remembers a deep, triumphant voice singing "Conaaaan the Barbariaaaaan"?! Please, if you feel like you remember this too, let me know!

Up next: I had no idea about this connection before I decided to insert Conan the Barbarian into the list, but it turns out there's a link between Conan and the next movie, which had some script work done by the director of Conan, John Milius. From 1971, it's Dirty Harry

#42: THE TERMINATOR (1984)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

9

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, once, a long time ago, I think in high school

BEST SEQUENCE

The whole climax is pretty awesome. I have no issues with Arnold's performance, but when his flesh burns off and the robot skeleton rises from the flames, that's when you know shit's getting real and everything that happens after that is great

BEST LINE

"Come with me if you want to live"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

100%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"With its impressive action sequences, taut economic direction, and relentlessly fast pace, it's clear why The Terminator continues to be an influence on sci-fi and action flicks."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"A cyborg assassin from the future attempts to find and kill a young woman who is destined to give birth to a warrior that will lead a resistance to save humankind from extinction."

DIRECTOR

James Cameron

MAIN CAST

Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, Michael Biehn, Paul Winfield, Lance Henriksen

THOUGHTS

• I didn't mention this when I reviewed it, possibly because I didn't realize it, but Terminator 2: Judgment Day is the only sequel on the AFI list (unless you count Goldfinger, and I don't, really; that's more of a franchise entry and less of a direct sequel to anything that came before it). That also means that T1 and T2 are the only example of multiple movies from the same franchise being on the AFI list without me adding them myself
• I don't want to spend the whole review comparing the two movies, so I'll get it out of the way early. I prefer T2, which I gave a 10/10. They are different flavours of movie, though. T2 is more rip-roaring action while The Terminator is more of a sci-fi horror/slasher so, depending on what you're in the mood for or what genre of movie is more likely to thrill you, your mileage may vary for which one you prefer
• When it comes to sequels and franchises I tend to give the edge to the first in a series - usually more novel and original and often more likely to have a lot of the filmmaker's best ideas. In this case, though, part of my enjoyment in watching this movie came from seeing how it enhances the sequel. Linda Hamilton is very good in this as the person being pursued by the Terminator, but it's even better when we know what a total badass she'll later become. Schwarzenegger is fantastic as an unfeeling killing machine in this movie so it's a great subversion when he becomes a good guy. Even my pick for the best line, "Come with me if you want to live" - it's a great line when Kyle Reese says it to Sarah so it's also great when the Terminator says it to Sarah in the sequel to show her that he's there to protect her, not to kill her this time
• Speaking of best lines, runner-up was "You're terminated, fucker." It might seem odd that I'm not choosing probably the best-known line from the movie, "I'll be back," but I also found it kind of odd that that became the iconic line. It comes immediately before Arnold rams a car into a police station, but aside from that it's kind of unimportant as far as lines of dialogue go
• And speaking of cars, loved the car stunts in this movie. You know me, I like a good car stunt
• I liked the special effects a lot, even if they were a little janky at times, let's be honest. The fake Arnold head that was used for the eye surgery scene, for example. In no way was it convincing, but the whole thing was filmed with such sincerity that it still worked for me. Same goes for the robotic Terminator that was used in the climax
• Lots of great action sequences aside from the climax. Also worth mentioning, the shootout in the club and the Terminator's assault on the police station. It was also a very chilling moment when Sarah realizes that only people named Sarah Connor are being targeted by the Terminator's killing spree
• And believe it or not, with that we have seen the last of Arnold Schwarzenegger on the AFI list (although Predator will be coming up in the Readers' Poll movies). I was fully planning on just leaving it at that until I looked up Arnold's filmography while watching The Terminator and realized how early it was in his body of work. Then I saw that The Terminator came right after another movie I'd never seen and I made the call to add one more Schwarzenegger movie before moving on. So...

Up next: Conan the Barbarian from 1982 (but I probably won't bother with its sequel, Conan the Destroyer, even though that one came out only 4 months before The Terminator)