#39: DIE HARD (1988)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

10

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, many times, although the first time was actually fairly late, I think in 2007 (possibly to coincide with the release of Live Free or Die Hard, which I have also seen)

BEST SEQUENCE

The whole movie is so great that this is a hard choice to make, but this time I'm going to go with the first face-to-face meeting between John McClane and Hans Gruber, when Hans knows exactly who he's speaking with, and John has no idea (or does he?)

BEST LINE

"Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker."

- On the other hand, this was a pretty easy choice to make. Iconic!

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

94%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Its many imitators (and sequels) have never come close to matching the taut thrills of the definitive holiday action classic."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"A New York City cop, John McClane, tries to save his estranged wife and several others taken hostage by terrorists during a Christmas Eve party at the Nakatomi Plaza Skyscraper in Los Angeles, California."

DIRECTOR

John McTiernan

MAIN CAST

Bruce Willis, Alan Rickman, Alexander Godunov, Bonnie Bedelia, Reginald VelJohnson, Paul Gleason, De'voreaux White

THOUGHTS

• Merry Christmas, everybody, and welcome to my review of Die Hard, one of my favourite action movies ever made! It's also one of my favourite Christmas movies (A Christmas Story is also high on that list), but apparently there are some that argue Die Hard being considered a Christmas movie at all. Some people say that it's just an action movie that happens to be set at Christmas, and the Christmas-ness of it all isn't really incorporated into the movie as a whole. The argument has been made that Die Hard would work just as well if it was set on any other day of the year, and it's such a good movie that I can't really disagree with that, but the facts are that this movie is set at Christmastime, and there are Christmassy elements in it, so it is a Christmas movie! There's also the tiny detail that it was released in July. But Gremlins and Batman Returns were both released in June, and I consider them to be Christmas movies as well
• I don't watch Die Hard every year, but when I do watch it I have my own little tradition - I always watch it with a big ol' meal of fried chicken. I call it Fry Hard
• Die Hard had such a brilliant premise that it has now been imitated many times, but everything went so right the first time. One cop in a building full of bad guys. A fantastic lead performance by Bruce Willis. An all-time great villain in Alan Rickman's Hans Gruber. And so many smaller details that add to the movie and pay off in spades. Think about the fact that John's barefoot throughout. It's set up convincingly enough, with John taking off his shoes and socks for a relaxation technique. Then it continually adds to the intensity of what he's going through, eventually leading to what I almost considered the best scene of the movie, John needing to flee by running across multiple panes' worth of broken glass on the floor. This is also a great example of one of the movie's biggest strengths, the fact that John McClane is just a regular guy. He's not an invincible action movie star, not in the least. He gets beat up, he gets shot, and his feet get torn to shreds, and he shows the wear and tear. But John McClane takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'
• This was Bruce Willis's first action role, and it was surprising to people at the time, because he was best known for the romcom TV show Moonlighting. He's so good in this, though, and it's partly because he doesn't take the whole thing too seriously. I find him very convincing as a regular guy put in this situation, and even his wisecracks don't come off as too clever or too scripted. Bruce Willis is very funny alongside being a great action star, but the jokes that are made by John McClane just seem like a guy trying to keep himself sane, as opposed to a screenwriter trying to make an audience laugh
• Willis is perfectly matched by Alan Rickman, in his first movie role, if you can believe it. Hans Gruber is one of the best movie villains of all time, no question. He's clever, he's pragmatic, and it's also great to see his meticulous plans go awry, and to see how he pivots. I also love that he's not actually a terrorist, he's only interested in money, but he takes such pride in his work that one of the only times we see him lose his cool is when he's called "just a common thief"
• I've seen Die Hard many times, but on this viewing I especially admired how much the walkie-talkie added to the movie. The conversations between John, Hans and Al (Reginald VelJohnson) are remarkably entertaining, and it's great to see these characters interact even when they don't really know who they're speaking with. By the way, my runner-up for best line is probably "No fucking shit, lady, do I sound like I'm ordering a pizza?!"
• We've talked about Bruce Willis before (Pulp Fiction, The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable), but Die Hard is his last film on the list. My heart goes out to him and his family, but with the state of his health, it's pretty much guaranteed that we won't be seeing him in another movie ever again. What an incredible career he had, though, and he's always been a welcome presence on my screen. With that said, I'm not quite done with one of the greatest action stars of all time, and one of the greatest action movie characters of all time, so we're going to stick with John McClane for a couple movies more

Up next: Die Hard 2, soon to be followed by Die Hard with a Vengeance (but I think that's where we'll stop; I don't remembering hating Live Free or Die Hard, and I don't even think I've seen the final movie of the series, A Good Day to Die Hard, but Vengeance will be a good note to go out on)

#40: 2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY (1968)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

I could have sworn that I had, but I really don't think so, at least not all the way through

BEST SEQUENCE

The scene of Dave shutting down HAL while HAL narrates his own demise

BEST LINE

"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that."

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

90%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"One of the most influential of all sci-fi films -- and one of the most controversial -- Stanley Kubrick's 2001 is a delicate, poetic meditation on the ingenuity -- and folly -- of mankind."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"When a mysterious artifact is uncovered on the Moon, a spacecraft manned by two humans and one supercomputer is sent to Jupiter to find its origins."

DIRECTOR

Stanley Kubrick

MAIN CAST

Keir Dullea, Gary Lockwood, William Sylvester, Douglas Rain

THOUGHTS

• Perhaps more than any other movie that I've ever reviewed, I suspect that I would give 2001 a much higher Thrill Score if I had seen it in the theatre, and especially if I had been alive to see it when it first came out. The visuals and special effects are stunning, and it would have been mind-boggling to see back in 1968, a whole year before Neil Armstrong's first step on the moon
• And the visuals absolutely still hold up today. This movie is mesmerizing, a feast for the eyes (and the ears; the classical music works incredibly well with what we see onscreen). Not surprising that 2001 won the Oscar for Best Special Visual Effects, although it may be surprising to learn that this was the only Oscar awarded to Kubrick personally. He never won Best Director, and none of his movies won Best Picture
• Time to say something potentially controversial, though. It's a good thing that the astonishing special effects are so memorable because not a whole lot happens in this movie. This may be a case of me just not getting it, maaaan, or maybe I'm a bad cinephile who wants a little bit more in terms of plot. The movie is split up into four chapters, and aside from each chapter having some great special effects, I have very little to say about three of them
• The makeup effects used for the hominids depicted in the first chapter are incredibly convincing (way more than in Planet of the Apes, in my opinion, which was wide released in the United States on the exact same day as 2001)
• The final chapter is indeed trippy as hell, but it also kind of luxuriates in the psychedelia for a good long while
• And the second chapter has some very impressive visual sequences and some fun depictions of futuristic technology (most of which would not actually come to fruition in the real year 2001)
• Which brings us to the most memorable chapter, and the one with the most plot. The third chapter is when we meet HAL 9000, one of the first examples of a murderous AI entity that I can think of. The vocal performance by Douglas Rain is perfect, and I love the way Kubrick films HAL's all-seeing glowing red "eye", filling up the whole screen at points
• While 2001 may not have entirely predicted the future, it is funny (or terrifying) to watch it today and note the similarities between HAL and Siri or ChatGPT
• Finally, 2001 was hugely influential, and I was reminded of two movies that I did see on the big screen, and which I remembered as being fantastic viewing experiences - Interstellar and Gravity (which I'll be reviewing eventually, it's on the Readers' Choice list). So I'm happy to add that while it's a shame I haven't seen 2001: A Space Odyssey in the theatre yet, that will soon be remedied. I already have a ticket to go see it at the Revue Cinema in January

Up next: Well I've dropped the ball a few times now in terms of movie reviews that should have been posted on certain holidays. Reviewing Halloween in March was probably the most obvious example. But I'm saying it now, as God is my witness, I shall review my favourite Christmas movie on Christmas Day this year. That's right, up next is Die Hard (and it is a Christmas movie, dammit!) 

READERS' CHOICE #21: SHAUN OF THE DEAD (2004)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

4.5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, multiple times

BEST SEQUENCE

Pool cues vs. zombie in the Winchester, set to the music of "Don't Stop Me Now" 

BEST LINE

"David, kill the Queen!"

"What?!"

"The jukebox!"

- There are lots of great lines and sequences in this movie, so I don't want to make it seem like this scene is the only one I like, but I'd be lying if I didn't pick this line as my favourite

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

92%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Shaun of the Dead cleverly balances scares and witty satire, making for a bloody good zombie movie with loads of wit."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"The uneventful, aimless lives of a London electronics salesman and his layabout roommate are disrupted by the zombie apocalypse."

DIRECTOR

Edgar Wright

MAIN CAST

Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, Kate Ashfield, Lucy Davis, Dylan Moran, Penelope Wilton, Bill Nighy, Peter Serafinowicz, Rafe Spall

THOUGHTS

• I really love this movie, but it's honestly a little hard to review it as a horror comedy. I mostly appreciate it as a very funny comedy, with a fantastic script and great performances. I don't even necessarily think the humour undercuts the thrills. The zombie action is actually very well done, and there are fair stretches of the movie that are played quite straight, like most of the climax in the Winchester pub. However, when I'm watching Shaun of the Dead I'm doing it for the laughs, not the scares. All of this is to say, if you think Shaun of the Dead is more thrilling than the 4.5 I'm giving it, I can understand that argument, and it might even be a good movie to ease some of the more squeamish into the zombie genre
• Speaking of the zombie genre, I like that Shaun of the Dead isn't a direct spoof of specific movies that came before it. It takes some inspirations, but it definitely manages to be its own thing. I like the gradual way that this zombie apocalypse develops, culminating in Shaun's morning walk to the shop when he still doesn't realize what's happening, made even more clear when juxtaposed with his walk to the shop on the previous day when everything was still normal
• A while ago I reviewed three of George Romero's seminal zombie movies (Night of the Living Dead and Dawn/Day of the Dead) and nearly every zombie movie made since these ones owes a debt of some sort to Romero's films. Shaun of the Dead wears it on its sleeve as a loving tribute, but not just in the Shaun of the Dead/Dawn of the Dead title reference. My favourite reference is a more subtle one, when Ed yells "We're coming to get you, Barbara!" This is almost a direct quote from Night of the Living Dead and one of its earliest lines, "They're coming to get you, Barbra." Delightfully, George Romero had a private viewing of Shaun of the Dead, and he didn't even realize this was a reference until Edgar Wright told him. Romero also loved the movie, by the way
• As much as I love Shaun of the Dead, though, I think I actually like its follow-up more. I thought about reviewing the whole Three Flavours Cornetto trilogy (so named because of their passing references to Cornetto ice cream cones), and I did in fact rewatch all three of them, but we'll just talk about them now. Hot Fuzz, a buddy cop action film, was the second one made in the series, and it's my favourite. The World's End, a sci-fi thriller, came third and it's my least favourite of the series (but I still think it's a lot of fun). Funnily enough (but not surprising, given the format of this blog), every movie in the trilogy directly references or parodies other movies that I've reviewed. As mentioned, there are the zombie influences in Shaun of the Dead. Hot Fuzz even more obviously references Point Break, even going so far as to show clips of it in the movie itself. And finally, The World's End is a pretty obvious riff on Invasion of the Bodysnatchers
• Finally, I felt like mentioning, while I love all three of these movies for their genre pastiches and their hilarious scripts and performances, none of them earn the distinction of being my favourite Edgar Wright movie. That would be Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, made in between Hot Fuzz and The World's End. However, I also don't think any of these movies qualify as Edgar Wright's most thrilling movie - I only saw Baby Driver once, in the theatre, but I remember liking it a lot, and I've rewatched some of those incredible car stunt sequences many times, and I think I'm probably due for a rewatch

Up next: And with that, we have finished another block of Readers' Choice movies! So it's back into the American Film Institute's list of thrilling movies, and boy oh boy, do we have some good ones coming up. We're going to start with a movie that I'm a little less certain about, though, and also one that I'm not sure I've seen all the way through. We haven't heard from Stanley Kubrick in a while, his previous movie on the list was Spartacus at #62, but he's back - 2001: A Space Odyssey coming up next

READERS' CHOICE #22: POINT BREAK (1991)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

9

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Never

BEST SEQUENCE

I can't decide, so I'm picking three: the FBI raid and shootout midway through the movie, the car chase and subsequent foot chase after Johnny catches the Ex-Presidents in the act of robbing a bank, and Johnny jumping out of a plane WITHOUT A PARACHUTE and catching up to Bodhi in mid-air. In fact, initially I was going to give this movie an 8.5/10, but then I rewatched these three sequences and decided they were worth at least another half point

BEST LINE

"Hey! The name's Johnny Utah!"

"Who cares?!"

- And by the way, isn't Johnny Utah such a perfect action movie name? I love it

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

69%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Absurd, over-the-top, and often wildly entertaining, Point Break is here to show you that the human spirit is still alive."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"An F.B.I. Agent goes undercover to catch a gang of surfers who may be bank robbers."

DIRECTOR

Kathryn Bigelow

MAIN CAST

• Keanu Reeves, Patrick Swayze, Gary Busey, Lori Petty, John C. McGinley, Anthony Kiedis
• 
  

THOUGHTS

• There's no particular reason why I haven't seen Point Break until now. It's definitely up my alley, but going into it I only knew that it was somewhat about surfing, I think I had a vague idea that there was skydiving involved at some point, and that there were bank robberies. I'm not even sure I knew about the Ex-Presidents' masks, though; masks that are now seared into my memory, because what wonderful masks they are - great visual gags, incongruously goofy to be seen during a violent bank robbery, and even a little unnerving, seeing the real eyes behind the rubber caricatures
• And I'll admit, for the first half of the movie I was kind of thinking, "well, sure, it's exciting if you like surfing." Because there is a LOT of surfing in the first 50 minutes or so, and comparatively little action aside from the first bank robbery and Johnny and Bodhi fist fighting with a bunch of bad guys, including Anthony Kiedis (yep, Mr. Red Hot Chili Peppers, himself). But then we get to the FBI raid I mentioned above, and MAN does this movie kick into high gear. I may have even found it more exciting ultimately because the first chunk of the movie is a bit more calm. In the back half of the movie the gun fights get more violent, the interpersonal relationships get more intriguing, and the skydiving sequences are truly breathtaking
• We've talked about Keanu Reeves before, and we'll talk about him again. Across the AFI List (Speed and The Matrix) and the Readers' Poll (Point Break and John Wick), Reeves is one of the most represented actors. He's not entirely convincing in Point Break, but for the most part he matches the movie's tone, and I've said it before, he sells the action, which is really the most important part
• This is probably my favourite Gary Busey performance, not that there's much competition in that category
• And I really loved Lori Petty. Super cute, playing a love interest with substance and character, she was my favourite part of the movie's first half (and she's good throughout, but then, you know, there's more action to focus on). I've seen Lori Petty in basically nothing; apparently she was in Free Willy, but I have no memory of that whatsoever. Whenever she was onscreen in Point Break I couldn't take my eyes off of her
• It feels like I'm giving short shrift to Patrick Swayze, but I don't have a whole lot to say about him. He's good as Bodhi, but he's not the most memorable part of the movie, aside from the fact that he very clearly did all his own stunts and skydives. The shot of Swayze jumping out of a plane, with the camera fixed on his face, is pretty fantastic
• Finally, here's a fun fact for you: as far as I can tell, this may be the origin of the phrase "Young, dumb and full of come," or at least the popularization of it. From a brief Google search, I didn't see any sources that predated this movie. And, another fun fact, there are quite a few style guides out there about when to use "come" vs. when to use "cum," like this one for example, and I really did not expect to need to look this up at any point while writing about thrilling movies, but here we are

Up next: It's the last movie from this block of Readers' Poll films, and it's also probably the funniest one on the whole list. From 2004, it's Shaun of the Dead

READERS' CHOICE #23: THE DARK KNIGHT (2008)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

10

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, many times. It's also one of the very few movies that I saw more than once in the theatre when it was released

BEST SEQUENCE

Honestly this is a really tough call. The Dark Knight is so jam-packed with action scenes and set pieces that it feels like every time I watch it I remember whole chunks of the movie that I'd totally forgotten about, and I would be fine with pretty much any section of the movie being chosen as the best. This time, though, I'm going with the truck attack on the police convoy. If there's one thing I've learned in the last few years it's how much I appreciate a good car stunt, and when Christopher Nolan FLIPS AN 18-WHEELER it is just absolutely incredible.

BEST LINE

Another tough call. Rewatching it this time I was even surprised to realize how consistently quotable this movie is, how many lines have stuck around for years after the movie was released. For now, though, I'm going to go with "You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain."

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

94%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Dark, complex, and unforgettable, The Dark Knight succeeds not just as an entertaining comic book film, but as a richly thrilling crime saga."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"When a menace known as the Joker wreaks havoc and chaos on the people of Gotham, Batman, James Gordon and Harvey Dent must work together to put an end to the madness."

DIRECTOR

Christopher Nolan

MAIN CAST

Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Gary Oldman, Michael Caine, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Morgan Freeman

THOUGHTS

• Let's start with perhaps the least controversial thing I've ever said in these reviews: Heath Ledger is excellent in this film as the Joker. But more than that, I feel fairly confident in saying that not only is Ledger's performance my favourite performance in any superhero movie ever, it's one of the great villain performances of all time and all genres as well. He's terrifying, he's funny, he's violent, he's silly. Captivating and spellbinding, his performance draws you in completely. With all this said, it may be hard to believe that Ledger's only in about a fifth of the movie - he's in 33 minutes of the 2.5-hour movie, but man what an impact he makes. The unforgettable voice, the physical tics, the little humorous character beats; there's a moment I love when he's terrorizing the guests at the Harvey Dent fundraiser, and which I only really noticed on this viewing. He grabs a wine glass from one of the guests, and in doing so sloshes all of the wine out onto the floor. And then he takes a sip from the empty glass anyway. Just like the movie as a whole, this is a performance that always has something new for you to notice each time you watch it
• Heath Ledger was also the first person to win an acting Oscar for a comic book movie, an accomplishment that Joaquin Phoenix would also achieve by playing the same character (or, at least, another version of the same character) in Joker. Unfortunately, as we know, Ledger's Oscar win was also noteworthy for being only the second posthumous acting award given (after Peter Finch in Network). Ledger was certainly gone much too soon at the age of 28, but what an incredible career he managed to have in such a short amount of time
• But! Back to The Dark Knight. I've heard it said that a Batman movie lives and dies on the impact of its villain, and from the Batman films that I've seen (and I've seen most of them), I would agree with that sentiment. Aaron Eckhart's Harvey Dent/Two-Face is also a great villain (eventually; he's also a very effective co-protagonist), and I like him especially as a continuation of the Joker's schemes
• This is also a great Christian Bale performance, especially watching him bounce off of the Joker and try to bring him down without giving him exactly what he wants
• This is the only comic book/superhero movie we'll be discussing in these reviews, and I think that's probably appropriate. It's a pretty grounded movie, aside from the wild improbabilities and contrivances of many of the Joker's machinations, and in some ways it's more of a dark crime thriller than a typical superhero movie. In fact, Christopher Nolan and his brother Jonathan were influenced by movies like Heat and The Godfather while writing the script
• As far as comic book movies go, The Dark Knight is also noteworthy for another big reason: it came out in the same year as the very first MCU movie, Iron Man. Both were huge hits, and they were movies #1 and 2 at the box office that year, but The Dark Knight won by a couple hundred million. And yet, we all know how incredibly important Iron Man was, kicking off the MCU, and setting the stage for the last 15 years of blockbusters. And, on a personal note, Iron Man was the first movie review I ever wrote (as piddly as it was), back when I watched and wrote about every MCU movie at the beginning of this blog. As enjoyable as the Marvel movies were, though, I'm not sure I'd really call them thrilling. They were fun, they were exciting at times, and they were entertaining, but they lacked a certain heft that really made my heart pound, a level of thrills that The Dark Knight has in spades. At this point I also want to recommend a couple of really great articles from The AV Club by Tom Breihan, comparing and contrasting these two movies: Article #1 and Article #2
• Thinking back, as I went through all the Marvel movies I started to get so sick of all the CG effects, so bored with the lack of realness, and that's the last thing I want to say in comparing The Dark Knight with the MCU. In The Dark Knight, you can really feel the action. You believe what's happening on screen because, in a way, it actually is happening, much more so than so much of the action in the Marvel movies. Christopher Nolan is an incredible craftsman when it comes to practical effects, and it makes such a huge difference for me, especially in the context of a genre that can sometimes feel fantastical and fluffy. And, I'll say it again: he really flipped that truck!
• A while ago I mentioned that Quentin Tarantino was the only director I could think of whose entire filmography I'd seen, but I'm happy to say that this also applies to Christopher Nolan now. In the last year I watched Following and Insomnia, the two movies of his that I hadn't checked off the list yet, and all in all, his body of work is remarkable. As far as my favourite movies of his, we've actually now discussed two of my top three: in no particular order, The Dark Knight and Memento are definitely up there, and I think I'd add Inception (and if I get a good opportunity, maybe I'll review Inception as well some day)
• Side note, I was partly inspired to finish Nolan's filmography thanks to an excellent podcast, Blank Check with Griffin & David. This is a podcast that examines directors' whole filmographies, and it has become not just my favourite movie podcast, but one of my favourite podcasts of all time
• Up top I mentioned how hard it was to choose a favourite sequence and favourite line. I could go on and on and name many, but instead I'm going to give you a couple of runners-up for each
• Best sequence honourable mention: the opening bank robbery, and the Joker interrupting the meeting of crime bosses (which also has possibly my favourite line delivery in the movie: "You think you can steal from us and just walk away?" "Yeah")
• Best line honourable mention: "Some men just want to watch the world burn," and "Why so serious?"
• Finally, a little peek behind the curtain: for this review I didn't just watch The Dark Knight, I also rewatched Batman Begins and The Dark Knight Rises. I was going to write mini reviews of those movies as well, but this is a long review already, so I'm just going to condense my thoughts
• It's a good trilogy, and Christian Bale, Michael Caine and Gary Oldman are good in all three movies. I'm not a Batman expert, but it feels like the movies do the character justice. And, as mentioned above, Nolan films some great action scenes, with fantastic practical effects (the opening airplane sequence in Rises is also pretty incredible). But for me (and for most, surely), The Dark Knight is the best of the three by a fair margin, and again, it largely comes down to the villains. To be honest I find Batman Begins kind of boring, partly because I find Scarecrow and Ra's al Ghul kind of boring. And I really liked Anne Hathaway's Catwoman, but to close it off let's talk a little bit about Tom Hardy's Bane
• Because man, what a big swing that was. I loved Tom Hardy's brutal physicality, you really got the sense of how much damage he could do, but would we remember Bane at all if not for that voice? So much fun to imitate, and pretty impossible to forget, I support it as a character choice and a filmmaking choice in order to make a memorable villain. But here's the thing, Ledger's Joker also had an iconic voice, but that performance and that character were so good, I think we'd still be remembering the Joker regardless of what he sounded like. If Bane just sounded like a plain old tough guy, I'm pretty sure he, and the movie, would be largely forgotten
• OK, last thing before we close this out. I mentioned up top that I saw The Dark Knight multiple times in the theatre when it came out; I saw it twice. That distinction also goes to another movie we'll be discussing eventually, Hereditary. But there's only one movie that I can think of that I saw three times in the theatre: the 2007 film adaptation of Hairspray the musical. I contain multitudes

Up next: It's a rarity on the Readers' Choice list, a movie I haven't seen before! Point Break from 1991

READERS' CHOICE #24: MINORITY REPORT (2002)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

7.5

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, but not since shortly after it was released

BEST SEQUENCE

Eyeball transplant and the ensuing invasion of the Spyder robots

BEST LINE

Just before the eye transplant surgery

John: I'd like to keep the old ones.

Dr. Solomon: Why?

John: Because my mother gave them to me.

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

89%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Thought-provoking and visceral, Steven Spielberg successfully combines high concept ideas and high octane action in this fast and febrile sci-fi thriller."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"John works with the PreCrime police which stop crimes before they take place, with the help of three 'PreCogs' who can foresee crimes. Events ensue when John finds himself framed for a future murder."

DIRECTOR

Steven Spielberg

MAIN CAST

Tom Cruise, Max von Sydow, Colin Farrell, Samantha Morton

THOUGHTS

• Minority Report is a really fun movie with a lot of intriguing ideas. I don't just mean the things it has to say about destiny and crime prevention, though, I also mean all the sci-fi/action concepts we get treated to. Things like the shockwave shotgun, the cops' Sick Sticks, and the Spyder robots, they all get a scene or two to really stand out, and then the movie shuttles us along to the next exciting set piece. This isn't even mentioning the ideas that get even more screentime and room to breathe, like the huge touchscreens, or this future society's reliance on retinal scanning
• And yes, despite Minority Report coming out 23 years ago, this is still a future society - the movie is set in 2054. It's always fun to look at near-future, still recognizable societies in movies, to try to guess where the predictions might still get it right, and where we can have our doubts. Things like self-driving cars and personalized ads - they're already here, although maybe not to the extent we see in the movie. On the other hand, I don't expect to see physical media of really any sort still existing in 29 years, much less any Radio Shack stores or the TV show COPS
• The Precrime concept is completely engrossing, and the opening sequence is a great, exciting way to introduce us to how it works. I also got some chills during the big reveal at the end
• Lastly, it may surprise you to learn that this is the last we'll see of Tom Cruise in these reviews. Early in his career he was never exclusively an action movie star, but that has definitely changed more recently, especially with the Mission: Impossible franchise, a series for which I have a lot of affection (although, I must admit, I still haven't seen all of them. The last one I saw was Rogue Nation). Edge of Tomorrow was a little earlier on the Readers' Choice list, but I am honestly surprised that the American Film Institute didn't include any Tom Cruise movies. As a reminder, the AFI list was revealed in 2001, so 1986's Top Gun and 1996's Mission: Impossible were both eligible, and I think Mission: Impossible's vault heist still holds up as a perfect nail-biting action sequence. I'm not planning on it anytime soon, but maybe one day I'll do a Mission: Impossible series run-through

Up next: It's a big one! The Dark Knight from 2008

READERS' CHOICE #25: EVIL DEAD II (1987)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

6

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, many times, although I'm not totally sure when the first time would have been. Probably in university, but maybe in high school

BEST SEQUENCE

Ash vs. his own hand, especially when it's still attached to his arm. Honourable mention to the laughing scene, as well as the sequence when we see what Ash decides to replace his hand with

BEST LINE

"Groovy"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

88%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Less a continuation than an outright reimagining, Sam Raimi transforms his horror tale into a comedy of terrors -- and arguably even improves on the original formula."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"Ash Williams, the lone survivor of an earlier onslaught of flesh-possessing spirits, holes up in a cabin with a group of strangers while the demons continue their attack."
DIRECTOR
Sam Raimi

MAIN CAST

Bruce Campbell, Sarah Berry, Dan Hicks, Kassie Wesley

THOUGHTS

• We're here to rate movies based on how thrilling and scary they are, but I do want it known how much I love this movie. I've seen it many times, and I still watch it with a big smile on my face for the whole duration
• The action is hilariously slapsticky, the stop motion is creative and fun to watch, and the gore is ridiculously over-the-top, but is any of it all that scary? Nah, not really. To be fair to Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell, though, a lot of the choices they made as director and actor make it clear that scaring us wasn't their only goal. Even the jump scares are more about comic timing than anything else
• Bruce Campbell is absolutely delightful in this, and it should be emphasized that his performance is largely a one-man show for the first 35 minutes. He's charismatic. He's remarkably committed, especially when it comes to the physical stuff, throwing himself all over that cabin and beating himself up with his own hand. And, against all odds and despite the movie's tongue-in-cheek tone, I find him pretty convincing as a guy who's being driven insane. Sometimes it's surprising to think about how such a talented, watchable actor hasn't had a more mainstream career, but then again, the Evil Dead franchise has a pretty unique vibe that maybe wouldn't carry over to other styles of movie
• Side note, when did Ashley fall out of fashion as a name for boys? I've never met a male Ashley (but I have crossed paths with a few female ones)
• Side side note, I love the movie poster, and I have strong memories of seeing it on the VHS cover at Blockbuster back in the day, before I was even brave enough to watch scary movies
• So if Evil Dead II may not be the scariest movie I've ever seen, I do think it's perhaps the quintessential Evil Dead experience. That's the cool thing about this franchise, though. You have five different movies that are all fairly distinct from each other, so you really do get a different viewing experience with each one. And having said that, with no further ado...

MINI REVIEW: THE EVIL DEAD (1981)

• Thrill Score: 8.5/10
• That's right, baby, we're doing the whole franchise!
• This movie was extremely controversial when it was released. It received an X rating in the US, and it was outright banned in several countries, including the UK. It has since been re-rated NC-17 for "substantial horror violence and gore". Evil Dead II was originally released unrated, by the way
• And I think all this handwringing is pretty silly, to be honest. The special effects are so charmingly janky, and the blood and gore are so ridiculously excessive, that I find it hard to understand how anyone could be legitimately disturbed by these movies (which is not to ignore a specific scene involving trees and vines that is legitimately disturbing, but for other reasons)
• However, despite the janky excessiveness of it all, The Evil Dead does have a more serious tone and I do find it more effective as a horror movie, especially thanks to the super creepy makeup effects, some of the more convincing shots of violence (e.g. pencil in the ankle), and some pretty great performances (although the guy who plays Scotty is awful)
• Again, Bruce Campbell is excellent in this, although this Ash does have a bit less personality, and a lot less bravado and cockiness than in the later movies. I could seriously watch Campbell get thrown around a room all day. His girlfriend, Linda, is also the creepiest Deadite by far
• The Evil Dead movies occupy kind of a unique space in horror, combining aspects of slasher and zombie movies, especially the parts of a zombie movie when people start getting infected but haven't turned yet, and when you can't tell exactly who will go evil or when
• Finally, The Evil Dead got a big boost from a guy who's been mentioned numerous times in my reviews. Stephen King saw an early screening and he loved it. He described it as the "most ferociously original film of the year," and his support ultimately helped get the movie distributed

MINI REVIEW: ARMY OF DARKNESS (1992)

• Thrill score: 4/10
• Well, I must admit, I just don't like this movie very much. I admire Sam Raimi for taking a chance and trying something different, but when you take a chance like that you risk losing the qualities that made people like the previous movies in the first place
• The special effects and action scenes can be fun in a whimsical sort of way, but they're in service of a movie that I just don't find all that entertaining. And, again, I'm sure it was a deliberate choice, but there's really nothing scary about this movie at all
• Campbell is still very watchable, and again a lot of the movie is just him owning the screen by himself (and sometimes alongside miniature/evil versions of himself, probably my favourite scenes). It's also more clear than ever how much Ash's personality changes from movie to movie, in this one he's hilariously overconfident and kind of an endearing asshole
• The script has some great lines, it's a very quotable movie. Some of my favourites:
• "This...is my BOOMSTICK" 
• "Hail to the king, baby" 
• "Well, hello Mr. Fancypants. I got news for you, pal, you ain't leadin' but two things right now, Jack and shit. And Jack left town."
• Finally, Army of Darkness directly references another movie that I reviewed and didn't like very much. The magic words that Ash needs to remember, "Klaatu barada nikto," are taken directly from The Day the Earth Stood Still

MINI REVIEW: EVIL DEAD (2013)

• Thrill score: 8.5/10
• I only saw this once, in the theatre when it came out, and I remembered liking it quite a lot. Fortunately, it had been long enough that it was basically a whole new viewing experience, and again I liked it a lot!
• It's more in the style of the first The Evil Dead, there's very little humour to be found, but given the 32-year gap between movies the special effects are greatly improved and the gore and violence are unflinchingly realistic. The boxcutter scene is particularly memorable, and in fact it's one of the few parts that I still remembered from my first time seeing it
• As a good reboot should, this movie stands pretty well on its own, you don't need to have seen the previous trilogy to enjoy it. I did appreciate the nods to The Evil Dead and Evil Dead II, though, like the hand turning on its owner, said hand getting amputated (by an electric knife this time), and the return of the all-important chainsaw during the climax

MINI REVIEW: EVIL DEAD RISE (2023)

• Thrill score: 9.5/10
• Yep, in my opinion, the most recent Evil Dead movie is the scariest. An urban apartment building might be the exact opposite of a cabin in the woods, but this still feels very much like an Evil Dead movie, departures and all. This is also probably the coolest looking version of the Necronomicon
• The scares are scary, the violence is violent, and the gore is gory. Lots of great foreshadowing, too. You've heard of Chekhov's Gun, but how about Chekhov's Tattoo Gun? And let's not forget Chekhov's Scissors and, especially, Chekhov's Wood Chipper
• Finally, an aspect of Evil Dead Rise that I find particularly effective is the close family relationship between Deadite and victim. This plays a part in some of the other movies, especially Evil Dead 2013, but Rise turns the screws even tighter, with a mother-turned-monster locked out of an apartment and trying to attack her kids and her sister within. This added familial layer is performed very effectively, and definitely gave me some full-body shivers

And that's it, gang! All the Evil Dead movies in one post. Before we go, I do want to mention Evil Dead The Musical, a hilarious stage version of Evil Dead that I've seen twice (if you haven't heard of it, you need to know that the audience has a splatter zone), and Ash vs Evil Dead, a TV series that I haven't seen at all, but hope to someday. It was a lot of fun rewatching these movies, and I might even say it was

Up next: The only Spielberg movie on the Readers' Choice list, 2002's Minority Report