ROBIN HOOD: PRINCE OF THIEVES (1991)
THRILL SCALE 1-10
5
HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?
No, first time watching it
BEST SEQUENCE
The execution rescue scene
BEST LINE
“Locksley! I’m going to cut your heart out with a spoon!” - The Sheriff of Nottingham, with a pretty good threat
ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE
51%
ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS
“Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves brings a wonderfully villainous Alan Rickman to this oft-adapted tale, but he's robbed by big-budget bombast and a muddled screenplay.”
IMDB SYNOPSIS
“When Robin and his Moorish companion come to England and the tyranny of the Sheriff of Nottingham, he decides to fight back as an outlaw.”
THOUGHTS
- Well, let’s get it out of the way. Kevin Costner, as Robin Hood, is really bad in this. Most famously, he was ripped apart for his English accent, and it really is quite terrible, especially since you can tell that in some scenes there was an unsuccessful attempt. More importantly for me, though, he’s just so incredibly boring in this movie in general. He’s a black hole of charisma, and you’d think an outlaw leader living in a treehouse town would be having a little more fun, but he really isn’t interesting to watch.
- I’m not sure why, but I feel like I’ve always had an affection for Kevin Costner, despite not having seen him in much. I think he’s good in The Untouchables, and at some point in my life I’ve seen Field of Dreams and Bull Durham, and that’s about it. Thinking about those movies, Kevin Costner is maybe just a boring actor and that’s his range? It works in The Untouchables because that’s the character’s whole deal, but come on, Robin Hood needs a little more pep.
- Alan Rickman as the Sheriff, on the other hand, you can tell he’s having a good time, and that was generally the critical consensus. But in my opinion, he’s fine. Sure, he’s more interesting than Kevin Costner. But he doesn’t make this movie worth watching.
- He got more and more unhinged towards the end of the movie, but at the beginning I got distinct Hans Gruber vibes. If I want to get Hans Gruber vibes, though, I’m just going to watch Die Hard (a movie that we’ll be talking about in full a little later, and I can’t wait)
- The rest of the cast is also pretty much fine, with some more inconsistent accents. Christian Slater and Morgan Freeman pretty much sound like Christian Slater and Morgan Freeman. Respectively, I mean, they didn’t swap voices or anything, although I do think that would look and sound hilarious.
- The first half of the movie is terribly dull. I’m fairly certain Robin doesn’t even shoot an arrow until minute 56
- There are a couple of good action scenes in the back half of the movie - the Sheriff attacks Robin’s hideout, burning it down, and that’s pretty thrilling. As well, as mentioned above, the climactic sequence in which Robin saves a group of his men from hanging is pretty effective. Nice to finally be able to say that the climax of a movie is the best part, especially after most of the Marvel movies left me a little cold
ROBIN HOOD: MEN IN TIGHTS (1993)
THRILL SCALE 1-10
4
HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?
Yes, but it’s probably been 20+ years
BEST SEQUENCE
Little hard to choose a best sequence in a movie like this, but I’ll go with the rapid-fire gags in the training montage.
BEST LINE
“Because, unlike some other Robin Hoods, I can speak with an English accent.” - Robin, explaining why the people of England will follow him
ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE
40%
ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS
“Undisciplined, scatological, profoundly silly, and often utterly groan-worthy, Robin Hood: Men in Tights still has an amiable, anything-goes goofiness that has made it a cult favorite.”
IMDB SYNOPSIS
“A spoof of Robin Hood in general, and Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991) in particular.”
THOUGHTS
- Fun fact, Mel Brooks has not directed a movie since 1995 when he directed Dracula: Dead and Loving It. Robin Hood was the second-last movie he directed, and we can be honest, this is not peak Mel Brooks
- But did I have fun? Sure. More fun than I had watching the movie this was directly parodying
- I love Cary Elwes. He was clearly having a ball in this, and he’s actually pretty good at sword fighting, as we’ve seen in The Princess Bride, leading to this having a higher-than-expected Thrill Score!
- Richard Lewis as Prince John and Roger Rees as the Sheriff are also pretty fun! Slimy and sleazy
- All of these live-action Robin Hood movies include a scene where someone gets whacked on the butt with the broad side of a sword. Was sword spanking actually a thing?! Let me know, all you medieval scholars, and put your research to good use
- Jokes that flew miles over my head when I was a pre-teen:
- When trying to rouse the troops Robin makes an attempt at an inspiring speech by emulating Winston Churchill. This falls flat, so Dave Chappelle puts on some Malcolm X glasses and actually succeeds. Definitely would not have recognized the references, and especially the glasses.
- There is an attempt to assassinate Robin, in which a sniper hides out in a tower to shoot Robin with a crossbow. There’s a sign in the tower which reads “Royal Folio Depository,” referencing the fact that Lee Harvey Oswald shot JFK from the Texas School Book Depository.
- And yeah, Dave Chappelle was in this movie, in his film debut!
- And finally, a couple more lines that made me laugh:
- Isaac Hayes, as Asneeze, describing his son, Ahchoo: “He is in need of guidance. He is headstrong and cocksure. Or is it the other way around?”
- Robin’s servant, Blinkin, presenting Robin with a gift left to him by his late father: “Your father wanted me to give you this. He said that inside is the key to the greatest treasure in all the land...May I keep it?”
ROBIN HOOD (1973)
THRILL SCALE 1-10
4
HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?
Yes, but it’s been even longer, 25+ years
BEST SEQUENCE
The Phony King of England song
BEST LINE
“You heard his mightiness, move it, creepy, get lost. Begone, long one.” - Little John, in disguise, shooing away Sir Hiss
ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE
54%
ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS
“One of the weaker Disney adaptations, Robin Hood is cute and colorful but lacks the majesty and excitement of the studio's earlier efforts.”
IMDB SYNOPSIS
“The story of the legendary British outlaw is portrayed with the characters as humanoid animals.”
THOUGHTS
- I liked it! Fun voice acting, appealing characters, and nice animation and scenery.
- He’s a very prolific and famous actor, but I’m not sure I’ve ever seen Peter Ustinov in anything else. He plays Prince John the lion in this and he’s hilarious!
- I always had it in my head that Little John in this and Baloo from The Jungle Book were portrayed as the same bear. Phil Harris voiced both, but nope, they’re definitely different bears. Little John is brown and Baloo is grey
- I had the same idea about Sir Hiss from this and Kaa from The Jungle Book. They’re even further removed, though. Different voice actors and different appearance, although they do both hypnotize people with their eyes.
- At some point, practically every character in this movie says “oo-de-lally,” to the extent that I started to wonder if it was actually an expression from medieval England, but nah, apparently it was popularized in the 1950s. So much for verisimilitude.
- Also, multiple characters refer to the Sheriff as “bushel-britches” which is such an oddly specific thing to say more than once.
- Another pretty good escape scene as a climax!
And now, time to compare all four Robin Hood movies I watched!
Best Robin Hood: Errol Flynn in The Adventures of Robin Hood
Best Maid Marian: Olivia de Havilland in The Adventures of Robin Hood
Best Prince John: It's a tie! Claude Rains in The Adventures of Robin Hood, Peter Ustinov in Disney, and Richard Lewis in Robin Hood: Men in Tights, I like them all. But Prince John isn’t even a character in Prince of Thieves!
Best Sheriff of Nottingham: Alan Rickman in Prince of Thieves
Best Little John: Phil Harris in Disney
Best Friar Tuck: Mel Brooks as Rabbi Tuckman in Robin Hood: Men in Tights
Best romance between Robin and Maid Marian: Disney
Best Action: The Adventures of Robin Hood. If I could go back, I might even bump that Thrill Score up to a 7/10, but I shall try my best not to change scores after they’re decided
Up next: Speed! And spoiler alert, for the first time we’ll be talking about a movie that I think should be much, much higher up on the list!
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