READERS' CHOICE #42: UNCUT GEMS (2019)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

7

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Yes, a couple years ago. I liked it a lot the first time, and I think I liked it even more this time

BEST SEQUENCE

When Howard watches the final, climactic basketball game on TV. A guy watching a televised basketball game might not sound like the most thrilling thing, but if you've seen the movie you know why it's actually pretty exciting

BEST LINE

“You know what, Howard? I think you are the most annoying person I have ever met. I hate being with you, I hate looking at you, and if I had my way, I would never see you again.” - Howard's wife, rebuffing Howard after he tries to salvage their soon-to-be-ended marriage (and to be clear, the only reason Howard tried to salvage the marriage was because he had recently broken up with his much younger girlfriend, after believing that she was cheating on him with The Weeknd; also, to be clear, The Weeknd is in this movie, as himself!)

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

92%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"Uncut Gems reaffirms the Safdies as masters of anxiety-inducing cinema -- and proves Adam Sandler remains a formidable dramatic actor when given the right material."

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"With his debts mounting and angry collectors closing in, a fast-talking New York City jeweler risks everything in hope of staying afloat and alive."

THOUGHTS

• In a way, on this viewing I saw Uncut Gems as kind of an interesting companion piece to Nightcrawler, which I reviewed just a few movies ago. Nightcrawler was about Lou Bloom, an unnerving and unfeeling sociopath. Jake Gyllenhaal gave him very few characteristics which could be considered charming, and yet, I kinda liked the guy, while definitely not ever wanting to meet someone like him in real life. Adam Sandler's character in Uncut Gems, Howard Ratner, is nowhere near as cruel or dangerous as Lou Bloom (well, not dangerous to anyone but himself, anyway), but he is tremendously obnoxious. Abrasive and vulgar, self-aggrandizing and yet pathetically self-pitying, he truly is one of the most annoying film characters I can think of. And yet! I kinda like the guy. The whole movie depicts a series of misfortunes falling on Howard's head, most of them resulting from the bad decisions made by Howard himself, but I still wanted to see him come out on top. And at this point I do want to acknowledge that gambling addiction is a mental disorder, so while it can't be denied that the choices Howard makes are bad ones, there's only so much judgement one should pass
• Of all the vices in the world, gambling is one that never got its hooks in me, particularly sports gambling. And while the compulsion can be terribly destructive, this movie kind of made me understand why it's so thrilling and addictive for some. Like I mentioned above, during the climactic scene you definitely feel the tension in watching this basketball game play out
• And speaking of basketball, I know very little about it, and I know even less about Kevin Garnett, specifically. He plays himself in this movie, though, and he's a pretty good actor! He doesn't have a whole lot of heavy lifting to do, but he's convincing and has good screen presence
• As I mentioned before when I reviewed 12 Angry Men, usually my Thrill Score roughly lines up with my general approval for a movie, but there are times when I think a movie as a whole is of higher quality than just whatever number I assign to say how thrilling it was. Uncut Gems has often been praised as tense and anxiety inducing, but I didn't really find myself feeling all that anxious while watching it, even though I could recognize what aspects of the movie might inspire anxiety in other viewers. So, while for me it's not one of the most thrilling movies I've reviewed, I do think it's pretty high up just in terms of being a good movie, and I'd definitely recommend it for anyone who hasn't seen it yet

Up next: Another new movie for me, Ichi the Killer. Also the last readers' choice movie from this group of 10, after which we'll be diving back into the American Film Institute's list!

READERS' CHOICE #43: ONG-BAK: THE THAI WARRIOR (2003)

THRILL SCALE 1-10

7

HAVE I SEEN IT BEFORE?

Nope, first time

BEST SEQUENCE

Our hero, Ting, gets chased through Bangkok alleys by a gang of hoodlums, and the ways in which he evades capture just get more and more impressive

BEST LINE

"Now hand over Ong-Bak! Motherfucker!"

ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE

85%

ROTTEN TOMATOES CRITICS CONSENSUS

"While Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior may be no great shakes as a movie, critics are hailing the emergence of a new star in Tony Jaa, whose athletic performance is drawing comparisons with Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, and Jet Li"

IMDB SYNOPSIS

"When the head of a statue sacred to a village is stolen, a young martial artist goes to the big city and finds himself taking on the underworld to retrieve it."

THOUGHTS

• There's a purity of focus to this movie that I can appreciate, even while it means that it doesn't entirely resonate with me as a movie-watching experience. The plot is entirely inconsequential - a good fighter must retrieve something that is important to him, and he does so by fighting. The movie exists to string together scenes of Tony Jaa being remarkably skilled and athletic, and in this regard, it succeeds. He's pretty incredible to watch, especially knowing it's all really him
• But this movie is not going to stick with me, and I don't believe I'll ever get the urge to watch it again all the way through. I've seen the sights. I've appreciated the stunts. If I ever want to appreciate the stunts again, I'll probably just find some clips on Youtube (and to be fair, that wasn't actually an option when this movie was released in 2003)
• And with that said, basically this review is going to devolve into a list of cool things that happened! Which is also an accurate summary of the movie
• So, firstly, my pick for best sequence consists of our hero, Ting, and the movie's comic relief character, George, being chased by a gang of toughs. Ting fully hurdles over people, tables, sharp gardening implements, and frigging cars. Ting also jumps through a small circle of barbed wire and cartwheels between two narrow panes of glass, and I realize that me typing this out probably isn't doing much for you, so just go watch it. George, on the other hand, splits his pants. George's part of this chase scene, however, does contain my other favourite line of the movie, and the only line that made me laugh out loud. George gets cornered by the toughs who are pursuing him, he backs up against a butcher's cart, and grabs a big old knife. The toughs look defeated; George has won! Suddenly an elderly vendor walks by, declaring, "Knives for sale! Knives for sale!" Cut to George now being pursued by knife-wielding toughs
• I liked the sequence in which Ting has to fight three different guys in quick succession in an underground fighting club. Each fight is pretty cool, and I really liked the third fighter's strategy of just breaking a bunch of shit on Ting: a bottle; a chair; a table; a vase; a neon sign; and finally, yes, a refrigerator. I'm not joking
• There was a big tuk-tuk chase scene. There were some cool stunts, but let's be honest, The Fast and the Furious it wasn't
• Ting kicks a guy while his legs are on fire (Ting's legs, not the guy's)
• Some pretty gnarly broken limbs in the climactic fight scene, and the saw attack is pretty visceral
• And that's Ong-Bak! Good night, everybody!

Up next: With absolute certainty, I can say that this will be Adam Sandler's only appearance on this list. It's Little Nicky! (Just kidding, it's Uncut Gems; I've seen it before and it's great!)